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To improve relationship with others, you need to be aware of several sensible ways to complain。 为了增进与其他人的友谊，你需要知道多种明智的抱怨方法。 To start with, you need to be specific。 首先一点，你需要把事儿讲的清清楚楚 Don’t say, “Boy, did you act like a fool at the party?” Instead, say, “You embarrassed me by getting drunk and tel...全部

  To improve relationship with others, you need to be aware of several sensible ways to complain。 为了增进与其他人的友谊，你需要知道多种明智的抱怨方法。
   To start with, you need to be specific。 首先一点，你需要把事儿讲的清清楚楚 Don’t say, “Boy, did you act like a fool at the party?” Instead, say, “You embarrassed me by getting drunk and telling offensive jokes to my parents。
  ” 别这么说，“哥们，你在聚会上表现得真像个傻瓜？”换种方式，你这么说“你喝多了还跟我父母开些个过分的玩笑，这让我非常不爽” Secondly, stick to the present。
   Don’t mention old offences from last month or last year。 第二条，要就事论事。不要扯起上个月甚至去年的旧账出来。 By doing this, you take away attention from the problem at hand。
   这样做，你就把注意力从该说的事儿本身讲跑题儿了。 Moreover, when you complain, never add insults。 此外，你抱怨的时候，千万不能带着侮辱的话。
   If you start calling the other person names, that will only create anger and hurt any chance of getting the person to really listen to you。
   如果你开始吼别人的名字，这只会更增加别人的怒气，而且只会使别人不再去听你讲什么话。 A last point to remember is to complain privately。 最后一点，记着要报怨也要私下讲。
   Never criticize the other person in front of friends, parents, children, or anyone else for that matter。
   不要在朋友们，父母们，孩子们或者其它人面前为些事情批评人。 Criticizing in front of a third party has the same effect as insults。
   对着不相干的人去批评另一个人跟侮辱那人是一样的。 This shames the person being criticized and makes it very likely that the person will want to attack you orally rather than listen to you。
   被批评的那人受气以后更不会跟你沟通而是会想直接跟你对骂了。 Remember sensible ways to complain yet? 知道明智的抱怨是什么样了么？ Be specific。
   讲明白 Stick to the present。 就事论事 Don’t add insults。 别带着侮辱 Complain privately。 私下单独讲 。收起